3under3 guide to surviving sick children

I have been very quiet on the blogging front of late and it’s all down to not having a spare fecking minute because the mahoods have all decided to take it in turns to be sick!! I’m joking obviously they have no choice but if I didn’t know any better I’d swear they were in cahoots to time when they were all going to get it to have maximum effect!

Now I pride myself on having a strong immune system, not really getting sick very often especially since I have a job that means I’m always around children. The odd sore throat (from talking too much very likely!) but that’s usually it so I was confident that my children would inherit their mothers superhuman health!!!

The big girl wasn’t very old when these hopes were dashed and I felt like we never left the GPs. I could honestly feel the receptionist rolling her eyes every time I rang for an appointment. Every slightly high temperature, every red mark on her skin (quick grab a glass and see if it disappears!!), too many dirty nappies, not enough dirty nappies, etc etc. They love me in the doctors!! And if had £1 for every time I heard the words viral infection.....I’d have about £17......she’s only 3 ffs!

Anyway, I relaxed (ever so slightly!) and since the next two were born I only make fortnightly/monthly trips to the GP.....progress! Unless your heads hanging off you’ll be grand is my new mantra!*

(*obviously if anyone with a social services background is reading this I’d like to add the disclaimer that I do in fact take my children to the doctor for less extreme illnesses but that doesn’t have the same comedy value.....swear, please don’t report me!)

So when the weather changed (I’m my Granny!!!) and I started to get a sore throat and a runny nose I didn’t think much of it and as uncomfortable as it was it lasted for about 2 days. Then the mahoods started with runny noses I wasn’t too concerned. Started to get a wee bit more concerned when green stuff kept coming out of their eyes But they were all in good form and no high temperatures so we soldiered on. Then the coughing started! Sweet Jesus the coughing!!!

First the wee girl woke up in the night coughing and crying! For only a couple of hours...fun! I remembered how I felt myself when I had it so even though she didn’t have a very high temperature I decided she would benefit from a bit of Calpol. Got it into the wee dispenser and held it up saying this is going to make you feel better love. ‘No way!’ The wee girls says through her tears(this her new favourite thing to say having learnt it recently! Mammy is not a fan!). Aw darling it will make you feel so much better! ‘No way!’ This is only going one way and I can feel it....I’m going to have to hold her and give it to her which results in about 0.25% of the dose actually being consumed and calpol being in everyone’s hair and on everyone’s face! For the life of me I can’t understand why any child refuses calpol when they’re sick....
1. It actually will make them feel better and
2. It tastes lovely!
The big girl sometimes asks for it when there is quite clearly nothing wrong with her so when she refuses it I know for defs she’s sick!**
(**again for those who are reading this with social services in the back of your mind I don’t give her any calpol when she’s not sick, in fact I think I’ve talked so seriously about taking too much and not taking it unless you’re sick that when I go to give her the second part of her dose she says no Mammy that’s too much you’re going to make me sick! 🙄🙄🙄) 

Anyway I get the tiniest amount of the calpol into her in the end and hope it’s enough to make her feel slightly better. I’m trying to comfort her so she will stop crying too because not only is it making her cough worse, there’s the very real chance of her waking her sisters and I’ve enough to be dealing with!

She’s really blocked up too in her nose and throat and she keeps swallowing to try to clear it....with no success and every time it doesn’t work it seems to piss her off even more. I know what I’m going to have to do next and I don’t want to because it is not going to be fun for either of us. It’s time to Mammy up (which is like manning up except x 1000000! 💪🏻) and get the snotter sucker!! 😷🙈

Dis-gust-Ing but helpful to the wee girl. She however doesn’t seem to find comfort in this and has ramped up her squealing! Hugs and kisses aren’t working so it’s time to break out the big guns....Igglepiggle on my phone!

This does the trick and she stops crying! Thanks be to Christ! She eventually goes back over to sleep and so do I.....but I’m on borrowed time and it’s only a matter of hours before we repeat this!

Fast forward 3 WEEKS! And this has been happening every night with varying mahoods cast in the role of sick child but more often than I’d like Mammy in the role of Florence Nightingale! Why, WHY do they always want Mammy when they’re sick!?!?!😭

Thanks be to all that is holy they’re all back to full health now but the time hasn’t gone without leaving it’s mark, most notably the wee girl learning that squealing produces a reaction from Mammy and Daddy.......full disclosure the monitors may have been turned down at bedtime to maintain sanity, although she could still be heard quite clearly from down stairs!

This only goes on for 18 years I’m told so there’s so much of this in our future to look forward to.....wonder if taking wine in the calpol dispenser will make Mammy feel better...?